Uncle Jay Explains The News » Joe Biden

Uncle Jay Explains: August 3, 2009

unclejay — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 23:34:35 +0000

Happy Birthday Mr. President, even though you were really born on the International Space Station with the covert help of those who shot JFK from the off-site branch of Area 51 beneath Loch Ness. Also, Cash for Clunkers becomes Crash for Flunkers. Uncle Jay explains!

Uncle Jay Explains: May 4, 2009

unclejay — Sun, 03 May 2009 22:03:45 +0000

DO NOT DO THIS! And for more about how to protect yourself against whatever they’ve named the flu this week, do not watch TV or go on the internet. After all, Uncle Jay explains everything!

Uncle Jay Explains: Feb. 9, 2009

unclejay — Sun, 08 Feb 2009 23:14:00 +0000

So Christian Bale has a potty mouth. But this week, it was Congress who needed the plunger! How can they be so clogged and stopped up, but still manage to flush billions down the drain? Uncle Jay explains it all!

Uncle Jay Explains: Oct. 27, 2008

unclejay — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 21:51:59 +0000

The final days of the election plunge ahead! Obama’s getting reamed by Joe the Plumber, McCain’s mopping up after those poll numbers, Palin’s wiping down the smell of her fashion expenses, and Biden’s trying to plug up his mouth. Oh yeah, and there’s High School Musical 3. Uncle Jay explains it all!

Uncle Jay Explains the News: Oct. 6, 2008

unclejay — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 21:50:44 +0000

Our economy is saved! Think of the economy as a Damsel in Distress, and the government as a Handsome Prince on a Mighty Horse. Now, for a clue about how the government will handle this crisis, look directly underneath the horse. Uncle Jay explains it all, and of course includes O.J. Simpson.

Uncle Jay Explains the News: Sept. 29, 2008

unclejay — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 22:12:01 +0000

It’s the White House Cash House! The more you lose, the more you get! This week, Uncle Jay explains in great detail how the government bailout works.

Hahahaha … just kidding! Even the people in charge don’t know how it works! How do you think they got to be the people in charge?

Uncle Jay Explains the News: Sept. 15, 2008

unclejay — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 22:41:10 +0000

Why is this election going insane? Maybe it’s the high stakes. Maybe it’s the internet. Maybe it’s Maybelline. Put on your best lipstick as Uncle Jay explains the latest.

Uncle Jay Explains the News: September 8, 2008

unclejay — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 22:09:15 +0000

It’s hard to explain a general election when it’s turned into General Hospital. Throw in a few hurricanes and Guitar Hero, and Uncle Jay has quite a job this week.

Uncle Jay Explains the News – November 12, 2007

unclejay — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 21:43:13 +0000

This election’s starting to get ugly! Not that the rest of the news is very pretty: strikes, martial law, money worries, and even MORE toys sent to Mao’s Little Red Landfill. Uncle Jay explains it all!